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Group Leadership

9 DIFFICULT—AND BEAUTIFUL—TRUTHS ABOUT LEADING A GROUP

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By Taylor Combs

If you’ve been a part of a local church in the last generation, chances are you’ve been involved in some sort of small group ministry. Or at least you’ve been invited (several times) to be a part of a group, or to even lead one.

While small groups/community groups/home groups/life groups/missional communities (or whatever your church calls them) aren’t essential to the Christian life, they usually prove to be a fantastic vehicle for community and mutual discipleship.

I’ve been involved in groups for years, and for the last six years have had the privilege of leading basically the same group (although it has evolved and shuffled and moved around through the years).

After having our first child and moving into a busy season professionally, we’ve decided to step away, which has brought an opportunity for reflection. The Lord has taught me much during these years of leading.

At times it has been fun and easy, at times awkward, at times painful and difficult. But through it all, God has taught me invaluable lessons about ministry.

So, here are nine things I learned from six years of leading a community group.

1. SUSTAINED TIME IN THE WORD WITH OTHER BELIEVERS IS UNBEATABLE.

In our six years, we’ve worked together through 1 Peter, 2 Peter, Daniel, 1 Thessalonians, Romans, Matthew, and Zechariah.

Yes, it took six years to get through seven books of the Bible. Is that a slow pace? Absolutely. But sanctification moves at a slow place. And to get anywhere close to a thorough understanding of a passage of Scripture takes time.

Evangelicals are, historically, people of the Word. But most of our study of Scripture is done individually. But for some reason when we come together in groups, we think our time needs to be topic-focused or driven by a shared life-stage.

I’ve found that nothing replaces this slow, plodding, methodical progression through books of the Bible with other saints—young and old, men and women, mature and new believers alike.

2. EVERY GROUP GATHERS AROUND SOMETHING; WE MAY AS WELL MAKE IT SCRIPTURE.

As I alluded to above, most of our groups seem to gather around a shared life-stage or some topic of interest. Or, conversely, they gather around meals or prayer.

None of these things are bad in themselves, but are they best? The apostle Peter, in one of his better moments, noted that Jesus alone had “the words of life.” In Scripture, we have these words of life, our daily spiritual bread.

Let’s gather around them and feast together on every word that comes from the mouth of the Father.

3. COMMUNITY IS ESSENTIAL TO DISCIPLESHIP.

In most of today’s churches, joining or leading a small group is the best way to get community. Is it convenient? Not always. Is it awkward? Sometimes. Will it require something from you? Absolutely.

But it’s not good for us to walk alone; indeed, we cannot. You need the people in your church, and the people in your church need you.

This community has sustained me through good times and bad, and I hope, through it, I’ve helped sustain others.

4. YOU’LL GET PUSHBACK ON YOUR LEADERSHIP STYLE.

You cannot please everyone. The first three years of leading, I constantly made adjustments—asking more general questions to broaden the potential answers, then asking more specific answers for the sake of clarity.

Later, I asked higher-shelf questions to encourage hard thinking and vulnerability, then asked lower-shelf questions to create an open and welcoming environment.

Then I tried more teaching and talking with fewer questions, then more questions with less teaching and talking.

Perhaps this is why the first direct pushback I got about my leadership style hurt me so much—because that person had no idea how hard I tried to improve the environment and my own leading for years before she was even a part of the group!

My pastor gave me great counsel about this: “Maybe that person just needs to be in a different group where she meshes more with the leadership style.” I then suggested this group member join another group, and she did.

Everyone survived.

5. YOU MUST COMMIT TO WHAT YOU BELIEVE WORKS (BUT BE OPEN TO FEEDBACK).

There’s a difference in humble leadership and non-leadership.

Humble leadership listens to feedback; non-leadership is held captive to the opinions of others and is too scared to make a choice.

Related to the last lesson I mentioned, you have to remind yourself: I am, under God, the leader of this group. My pastors and church have entrusted me with this task. The Holy Spirit is empowering me for this task.

And, if you lose some people along the way, that’s okay; you’ve been humble, courageous, and faithful.

6. GOD WILL SANCTIFY YOU WHEN YOU FEEL UNDER-APPRECIATED.

My pastors and church staff do a wonderful job thanking and celebrating those who serve in the various ministries of our church.

But, until the night I announced I was no longer leading our group, I never once, in six years, was thanked for leading.

Now, it’s embarrassing to even type that—because it means I know it, which means I’ve been looking for applause.

And I’d be terrified if I learned anybody in my group read this! My pride and sin are exposed by admitting it.

But I’m not alone. We all minister with mixed motives, and part of my motives have always been to be applauded and thanked. God, in His mercy, used this lack of expressed gratitude to sanctify me over these past six years.

If you minister for the applause or the gratitude, ministry will eventually become your god, and it’ll kill you.

7. CONFLICT MAY COME, BUT IT WILL SHAPE YOU FOR THE BETTER.

The hardest season of ministry I’ve ever experienced came with the best of intentions.

In seeking to serve a close friend and member of our group, I jeopardized the friendship. A yearlong conflict, which never fully resolved, ensued.

The couple involved stopped attending our group, then left without telling us. It was gutting. But when you lead people for any amount of time, conflict is inevitable.

Again, be humble. Be willing to learn from mistakes and apologize if necessary.

Take the potentialities into consideration before acting. But eventually, with a humble, Spirit-filled confidence, do what you think is best.

Walk forward with courage; Jesus is with you.

8. LEADING WITH SOMEONE DIFFERENT FROM YOU WILL SHARPEN YOU.

This is perhaps the best way to mitigate some of your less popular leadership tendencies.

I’m a good teacher, but not the best conversation facilitator; my co-leader hasn’t been to seminary or been trained to teach the Bible, but he’s a fantastic conversation facilitator and studies and leads through the text faithfully.

I’m a bit more serious; he’s a bit more lighthearted. I’m infamously incapable of asking a decent icebreaker; he does a great job opening our time together.

Over the years that we’ve led together, we’ve balanced each other out wonderfully, which has been a grace of God.

Our group probably couldn’t have weathered two of me as their leaders!

9. FRIENDSHIP AND MUTUAL DISCIPLESHIP ARE WORTH THE HARD PARTS.

You may have read some of these lessons I’ve learned and think, I’m not sure group ministry—let alone leadership—is right for me. It sounds hard!

And you’d be right.

But group ministry is essential for friendship and mutual discipleship in local churches, and for group ministries to happen, someone has to lead the groups—a calling and a privilege that’s absolutely worth it.

This article appeared originally at Facts&Trends.net

TAYLOR COMBS (@combstaylor_) is an associate publisher for B&H Publishing and is active in the teaching ministry at Grace Community Church in Brentwood, Tennessee. He holds a master of divinity degree from The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary, and is currently a Ph.D. student at Midwestern Baptist Theological Seminary.

Group Leadership

Three Resources for Pastor Appreciation Month

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October is Pastor Appreciation Month. Being a pastor is more than a job; it’s a calling. During the past few months, this calling has faced strains. Congregations didn’t meet. Small groups transitioned to digital. Mental health crises increased. Many pastors could use extra encouragement right now.

But pastors aren’t the only ones feeling the strain. Group leaders and other disciple-makers are also in strenuous positions during these challenging times. LifeWay has several resources to strengthen both pastors and other trusted leaders as they encourage others. 

Through individual study and learning activities five days a week, this Bible study examines the eleven names of God. The words translated as name show up over one thousand times in Scripture and routinely carry with them power, responsibility, purpose, and authority.  To fully grasp the significance and power of knowing God’s names, you first need to understand the context of names within biblical cultures. Get to know the names of God through this study. It is in knowing His character and capacity that you can rest in and discover peace and power in His covenant care.

Foundations leads readers through the key, foundational passages of the Bible in one year, while still giving the flexibility of reading 5 days per week. Along with supplementary devotional content each day, you will experience the power of reading and responding to God’s Word. By using the H.E.A.R. journaling method, you will be guided through Highlighting, Explaining, Applying, and Responding to passages, for practical application throughout this year-long plan.

No More Excuses: A 90-Day Devotional for Men challenges men to lay down excuses, stop compromising, and fight to be a man of character and commitment. Each day includes a Scripture verse, short devotion, and thought-provoking question to help men find purpose, meaning, and direction in life to become the man God has called them to be.

We live in a radically skeptical age. Many in the church do not know the Bible as well as they would like and struggle with their own “big questions” about the faith. This study provides precisely what the church needs today: tools and answers. This study addresses several challenging topics including mental health and suicide, paranormal activity, the resurrection, how we got the Bible, suffering, and why God is sometimes silent. You will leave this study enriched, challenged toward a thinking faith, equipped to communicate confidently, and empowered to avoid trite answers to a skeptical world.

 

Group Leadership

Three Ways to Improve Your Bible Reading

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By Susan Hill

Charles Spurgeon said, “Nobody ever outgrows Scripture; the book widens and deepens with our years.” Sadly, biblical literacy is on the decline. A poll in Christianity Today revealed that only 19 percent of church-going Christians read their Bible every day.1 Tape-recorded readings of the Bible have proven that an individual can read through the entire Bible in seventy-one hours. That means it would take no more than 15 minutes each day to read through the Bible in less than a year.2 Perhaps you already engage in Bible reading every day and want to make the most of your time in God’s Word. Or maybe you’ve not been in the habit of spending time in the Scriptures, but would like to start. Here are three suggestions for getting the most out of Bible reading.

Pray before you read. The Psalmist wrote, “Open my eyes so that I may contemplate wondrous things from your instruction.” (Psa. 119:18) One of the roles of the Holy Spirit is to illuminate the Scriptures for us in a way that helps us understand them (1 Cor 2:14). When I approach the Scriptures, I want to learn things that I couldn’t know apart from the Holy Spirit revealing them to me. So before beginning my Bible reading, I often pray, “Holy Spirit, I pray you will teach me things I could not know apart from you.” Also, as I come across things in the text that I don’t understand I ask God to reveal the meaning. The answer doesn’t always come right away, but I’ve learned that if I continue to pursue the meaning of a text and pray for guidance, the answer comes.

Meditate on the text. There’s a time and place for reading large sections of Scripture in one sitting, but it’s also beneficial to read a small section (perhaps a chapter or two) and choose a key verse upon which to meditate. Unfortunately, many Christians in the West have abandoned the practice of meditation because it has become associated with Eastern religion. But meditation is a thoroughly biblical concept. Psalm 119:15 says, “I will meditate on your precepts and think about your ways.” Meditating on Scripture will increase our understanding of the text. People often claim they don’t know how to meditate, but that’s not true. If you are capable of worrying you already know how to meditate. To meditate is to turn something over and over in your mind and to think about it from every possible angle.

Interact with the text. As we read the text it’s crucial that we ask ourselves, “What did the original author intend to convey in this passage?” It’s important to take note of the context and look at the surrounding verses. Be sure to ask questions of the text. What is God revealing about Himself in the passage? Does the passage contain truths about God that prompt you to praise Him? Are there imperatives in the text that motivate you to pray for the grace to obey? Does the passage lead you to confession because it sheds light on your sin? Incorporating God’s Word into your prayer life will bring vitality to your prayers like nothing else. Hebrews 4:12 says, “ For the word of God is living and effective and sharper than any double-edged sword, penetrating as far as the separation of soul and spirit, joints and marrow. It is able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart.”

As Christ-followers we are called to be people who study and obey the Word of God—and in doing so, we’ll come to know the Author. There’s nothing more satisfying than pursuing a relationship with Christ through the study of God’s Word, so let’s be people who are immersed in the Scriptures. 

  1. http://www.christianitytoday.com/edstetzer/2014/october/biblical-illiteracy-by-numbers.html
  2. Donald S. Whitney, Spiritual Disciplines For the Christian Life, (NavPress, 1991, 33).

Susan Hill is a writer, Bible teacher, and full-time editor at LifeWay. She is the author of Dangerous Prayers: 50 Powerful Prayers That Changed the World, as well as numerous devotional books. She and her husband John live near Nashville, TN with two unruly Golden Doodles. 

 

Group Leadership, Uncategorized

Six Practices for Managing Your Group’s Prayer Time

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One of the challenges of leading a Bible study group is managing the time dedicated to prayer requests. We’ve all been in a group when prayer requests took the majority of the group study time.

Don’t get me wrong—I’m a big fan of prayer! The Lord’s house is to be a house of prayer. But as group leaders, you and I must learn to manage the limited time we have with our group members. That includes managing the prayer time so that needs are lifted up to God, while also allowing time for the other important elements of group life. 

Here are six ways you can more effectively manage your group’s prayer requests. These can help ensure that you are addressing people’s needs while still providing a well-rounded Bible study experience that is balanced and effective. 

Assign the prayer requests.   I will often write prayer requests on the marker board in my group’s meeting place at the church. One by one, people tell the group what kind of needs they have, and I list them one by one. I then ask group members to volunteer to take turns praying for the requests. Too often in groups, a list of requests are written on a marker board, but each request is not prayed for. Instead, someone offers a “generic” prayer and the study begins. I much prefer making sure that people’s specific needs are carried to the throne of grace.

Use “the basket method.” 3 X 5 index cards are perfect for gathering the prayer requests of group members. Use standard index cards (one per person) and ask group members to write down their prayer requests on one side of the card. Then ask them to turn the card over and write their name and contact information on the card’s reverse side. Cards are then placed in a basket (it doesn’t matter what type) as it is passed around the group. Once all cards are in the basket, reverse the process and ask group members to reach in and take one of the index cards. Ask group members to pray for the need on their index card throughout the week, and contact the person who made the request sometime during the week to let them know their request is being prayed for. In a larger group, this can save a significant amount of time, and all prayer needs will be covered. In addition, relationships can be strengthened as individuals receive messages from fellow group members that they are praying for the specific need.

Pray in smaller groups.  It can be intimidating to pray out loud in a big group, so consider dividing your group into smaller ones. People who will not speak up in a group of 15 or more people will often talk in a group of 3 to 4 people. Breaking your groups into triads or quads may be just the thing to encourage people to pray out loud for their fellow group members. If your group is a virtual group, and if you use Zoom, don’t forget to use the “breakout room” feature to divide your group into smaller ones online.

Email requests after the group Bible study.  After hearing your group member’s prayer requests (and writing them down, of course), set aside time after your group’s Bible study and send out the requests via email (when recording on a marker board, use your smartphone to capture a picture of the requests). This way everyone in the group will have a current list of the group’s prayer requests each week. 

Use email to generate the prayer requests. On occasion when I can see that the Bible study is going to run long, I will say something like, “I’ll send an email to the group later today, and summarize the study for us and those who were not here today. If you have a prayer need this week, just ‘reply all’ and let us know what it is. We’ll jump into action and begin praying for you.” I then control the length of the prayer time by simply praying for the Lord’s blessing on the group, our study time together, and those not present. When I’m running short on time, this allows me to complete the Bible study, but still make sure that requests are known and prayed for during the week.

Use your Care Groups to pray for needs. Not every group is organized into Care Groups, but these are especially helpful when it comes to praying for the needs of group members. A Care Group is simply a subgroup of your Bible study members. These groups are typically 4 to 6 people and function best if the members are the same gender (husbands and wives will be in two different Care Groups). At the end of a Bible study, the group can break down into Care Groups to pray. 

Other than serving as the manager for LifeWay’s ongoing adult Bible studies and as the Director of Sunday School, Ken is an 18-year church education staff leader and blogs regularly about Sunday School and groups ministry at kenbraddy.com.

 

Group Leadership

Who is Your All?

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In the front entrance of LifeWay sits a display case that includes some notes written by Arthur Flake. He had been hired as the first Director of Sunday School and was preparing to write his first book in that role. The page on display includes this statement: All need to study the Bible. Most of us would agree with this statement and move on. A few might change the word need to should or ought, but would still affirm the spirit of the statement. 

The statement “all need to study the Bible” seems simple until we start to look at the history behind this statement. 

  1. It was 1920. The world had endured the Spanish Flu and World War 1 in 1918, followed by social unrest in America in 1919. High unemployment, stiff competition for jobs (soldiers returned from Europe without any re-entry plan), and an economy ramping down after a war contributed to a season of riots. Every region was impacted and stained in some way. We still don’t know how many people actually died in this season. To call for ALL to be in Bible study in 1920 went in the face of what had been going on in society. Flake was calling for a radical change with Bible study groups leading the way.    
  2. ALL came from experience. Flake had built a Bible study ministry that embraced the belief that all people need to study the Bible. He was responsible for the Bible study groups at First Baptist Church in Ft. Worth, TX prior to returning to what is now LifeWay as director of Sunday School. At that time in their history, FBCFW met in three different locations as they awaited the rebuilding of their facilities (fire gutted the facilities in 1912). Groups met in whatever space they could find and at times other than Sunday. In January of 1920, FBCFW became the largest attended Sunday School in the US at the time. 
  3. ALL is not so easy to define. We might be tempted to think of prejudice only in terms of race but it goes beyond that. In FBCFW at that time, one could find union leaders and union busters, police officers and convicted criminals, white collar workers and blue collar workers. Each of these designations created some type of division with a prejudice held somewhere in the other group. That is how labels and distinctions play out.  

That brings us to the question of our all. Who is missing from our Bible study groups and why? Do we have a place for “them” or have we made it clear that those outside of our group are not welcome? Have we already answered “no” for them before inviting them to join us for Bible study? Who might attend if we really did have the mentality that “ALL people need to study the Bible”? 

Do our actions match our words that everyone needs to study the Bible? Who is your all and what are you doing to involve them in Bible study? 

Dwayne McCrary is a team leader at LifeWay, adjunct professor at Midwestern BTS, and Bible study leader in the church he attends.

Group Leadership

Equipping Group Leaders for Conversations on Race

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How do we seek to bring the gospel into our conversations and actions about race?

This is a question we cannot ignore in our small groups. In light of recent events, group leaders have unique opportunities to engage and encourage their members towards Christ-centered action. This isn’t a one-time conversation, but an ongoing discussion.

But what if group leaders don’t feel equipped?

This cannot be an excuse for non-engagement. Thankfully, many trusted voices have already stepped in and offered wisdom as a resource for those who feel ill-equipped.

In the video below, highly-respected author and pastor Dr. Tony Evans shares from his life experience as an African-America, a Christian, and a pastor. In his interview with Trevin Wax, he discusses the ways the gospel informs how he thinks about and addresses racial injustices in America (and much more). He gives counsel to pastors as they seek to speak about racial injustice, even when they are afraid to do so.

 

For further insight, consider the additional resources below:

Let’s continue to seek justice and love mercy as we strive to walk humbly with our God (Micah 6:8).

Group Leadership

Five Ways to Know You Need to Join a Small Group

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By Susan Hill

Small groups play a vital role in discipleship because they are the place where believers have the opportunity to come together and build close relationships within the context of the local church. In a perfect world, every church member would be an active member of a small group. But maybe you’re still on the fence about joining one. Here are five ways to know if you need to join a small group:

  1. You want to study the Scriptures at a deeper level. One of the primary benefits of participating in a small group is studying the Scriptures with other believers. In a group study, you’ll have the opportunity to learn from other people, ask questions, and discuss how to apply the Bible to daily living. Also, you’ll probably study portions of Scripture that you might not read on your own. As Christ-followers, we should have a growing knowledge of the Scriptures, and one of the most practical ways to grow in our understanding of the Bible is to study among a community of believers.
  2. You long for community. It’s often been said there are no “lone rangers” in the Bible. God designed people for community, and it’s impossible to become the person He created us to be apart from the local church. Being an active member of a small group provides the opportunity to build relationships with other believers. If you commit to being an active member of an ongoing small group, over time, there’s an excellent chance you’ll meet many of your closest friends there.
  3. You want a place to serve in your community. Many Christians want to serve in their community but don’t know where to start. Small groups provide an excellent outlet to locate needs in the town you live and serve in those places. Areas to serve might include local homeless shelters, soup kitchens, non-profits, hospitals, nursing homes, universities, or anywhere in your community where there’s a need. As Christians, we are called to love God and our neighbors (Mark 12:30-31). Our communities should be better off because of the presence of the local church. Small groups serving together in the community are an excellent way to achieve this.
  4. You want friends who will pray with you. We all need prayer. Being a part of a small group means you already have a group of believers in place who are willing to pray on your behalf. In most small groups, there’s a time for people to share prayer requests. As you become familiar with people in your group, you’ll share phone numbers and email addresses. When something comes up during the week, and you need someone to join you in prayer, you’ll have a group of people to contact.
  5. You want brothers and sisters in Christ who will be there for you through thick and thin. No one joins a local church with the intention of falling through the cracks. Everyone longs for a place to worship in the local church where they know people and are known by others. Attending worship on Sunday mornings is a crucial part of the Christian life, but involvement with our church family shouldn’t be limited to one hour a week. In many churches, it’s easy to come into a worship setting on Sunday mornings and leave without being seen or speaking to anyone. A small group is the best place to nurture deeper relationships. Small groups allow believers to genuinely get to know one another and build relationships that last through every season of life.

Susan Hill is a writer, Bible teacher, and full-time editor at LifeWay. She is the author of Dangerous Prayers: 50 Powerful Prayers That Changed the World, as well as numerous devotional books. She and her husband John live near Nashville, TN with two unruly Golden Doodles. 

 

Group Leadership

Six Reasons Why Personal Study Guides are More Important Than Ever

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We’re six months into our country’s attempt to slow down the spread of the Coronavirus. Many of us were sent home to work. Our churches moved to online worship and group Bible studies. Some churches have now begun to meet again on campus for worship, and others have reopened their Bible study groups with safety precautions in place. But there are a good number of churches that cannot meet because of guidelines given by their state or local leaders. “One size doesn’t fit all” is certainly true of how churches are responding to the need to get their people back together. But there is a way for churches to continue to encourage group members to press on in their journey to be more fully obedient disciples. And the plan involves a Bible study tool that has been around for over 100 years!

I work for LifeWay, a company that produces discipleship tools called Personal Study Guides (some people still refer to them as “quarterlies” because they last 13 weeks before a new series begins). Each session introduces a biblical text, has a main point, helps the reader understand the biblical background, customs, and practices of the times, and is a tool that helps growing Christians self-feed on God’s Word. There are also key word studies and application suggestions to help people live out the Bible in their daily lives. These personal study guides are used in a group Bible study, and they are also studied by individual group members in between their group times.

COVID-19 has proved challenging for churches. As we slowly return to our church campuses and some semblance of normalcy, personal study guides are more important than ever before. Even while people are separated and cannot meet, they can still use the personal study guide to learn and apply God’s Word in these tumultuous times. Here are some reasons why personal study guides are more important than ever before.

  1. Reading the Bible and other Christian literature daily is critical for year-over-year growth. If you don’t believe me, read the book The Shape of Faith to Come by Dr. Brad Waggoner. It was demonstrated through research that the number one factor and predictor of a person’s growth as a disciple is whether they self-feed on God’s Word or not. During the days of “shelter in place,” curfews, and “safer at home” guidelines, this is the perfect time for a sequestered believer to have a discipleship tool in their hands that God can use to comfort them and speak to them daily. 
  2. Because of social distancing and the rise of virtual groups, a personal study guide will give people a common focal point. When groups get together online, they are going to want (and need) to talk. Having a personal study guide that you read, study, and respond to gives every member of the group a common point around which to study and share insights. What could be better for churches than placing a discipleship tool in the hands of every adult member and guest, knowing that people are sheltering in place, working from home, and finding themselves with some amount of time on their hands each day? Now more than ever, adults are going to want and need something on which to focus besides COVID-19. What better to focus on daily than God’s Word?
  3. Because personal study guides are available digitally, each person in a separated group can have a study guide without any physical contact. Virtual classes need virtual curriculum, and the personal study guides produced by LifeWay come in the form of E-books. With a few keystrokes, personal study guides can be in members’ inboxes in a matter of seconds, making distribution a snap.
  4. A personal study guide provides group members with an interactive and engaging experience. Personal study guides produced by LifeWay have excellent authors who write each session. They bring their education, ministry experiences, and much more to the pages of the personal study guides. Questions placed throughout each session help people think critically about spiritual matters. Anyone using a personal study guide benefits from the author’s expertise, training, and background.  Places to write responses and journal thoughts further enhance the experience.
  5. A personal study guide is based on a wise discipleship plan crafted by experts. It takes painstaking work to create complex plans for a Bible study series (those plans determine the scope and sequence—the topics and the order in which they are studied—of the studies). These plans have been developed by specialists with advanced degrees in theology and Christian education, working together to determine what topics are studied and in what order. 
  6. A personal study guide is an affordable way to disciple people. Did you know that you can purchase a study guide for each group member for only $3.15 each? That’s just $.03 per person, per day! What an investment opportunity for every church. Personally, I consider this to be the absolute best value when it comes to disciple-making.

Yes, COVID-19 has changed us as a nation, and it has changed our churches. But I believe it is going to change us for the better! We are already realizing how important group Bible studies are to God’s people. And we are relearning that people need a trustworthy tool and a well-crafted plan for helping people grow as disciples. Making disciples was one of the final things Jesus told His church to do (Matthew 28:18ff). Today, personal study guides are more important than ever in the disciple-making process.

Group Leadership

10 Tips for a Brand New Group Leader

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I wish someone had written this article for me “back in the day.” My first step into becoming a group leader took place right after I got married. My new bride and I were recruited to teach a group of eighth grade girls. I had no clue how to be an effective leader at that point in my life, but I had the job of leading those girls, and as I remember, we had a bunch of them!

As I reflect back on that experience, and as I have spoken with hundreds of group leaders across the country, I’ve come up with a “top 10 list” of things that brand new group leaders should consider. I’d have been a better teacher if someone had shared these with me in 1987. Yes, I just dated myself. If I could tell my younger self only 10 things, here they are in no particular order.

    1. Teaching is not telling. Learning is not listening. I remember telling my wife something really dumb after accepting the group leader position with those eighth grade girls: “Charles (my pastor) has his 45 minutes, now I have mine.” Yikes. Because no one told me differently, I thought my job was to prepare a lesson and do all the talking. After all, I’m the one who studied and prepared, and I had a lot of important things to tell those girls. Wrong. I would have been a much better teacher if I had learned to more fully engage them in the Bible study. Little did I know that there are 8 learning approaches. I learned to incorporate those in time, but boy do I feel bad for that first group of girls. I was a “talking head” and I’m sure they were bored to tears.
    2. Don’t take yourself so seriously. Yes, leading a group is important. Yes, it’s a serious thing to be responsible for the spiritual growth of a group of people. But don’t take yourself too seriously. Have fun. Laugh at yourself. Realize that if the group is laughing at you, that’s OK. You really only have an audience of one—the Lord. Don’t worry what others think about you, your teaching, or a host of other things. Seek to please the Lord in all you do, and if you trip up, know that gravity is going to still work, and the sun will rise tomorrow. The world won’t end, so loosen up.
    3. If you have to choose between being a great teacher or a great shepherd, choose shepherd. My son entered the 12th grade when our family moved to Nashville, Tennessee. He began his last year of high school at a strange new school, and he had to find new friends. One place I hoped that would happen was our new church. He only had 5 other young men in his Sunday School class, but when he began missing on Sundays (he visited other churches with Christian guys he met on his football team) his teacher never contacted him. Not once. Not in twelve months. Although this man was a good teacher, I’m sure, he was a lousy shepherd. My son learned all too quickly that he didn’t matter to his 12th grade teacher, and it soured him on the church. The old saying is true: “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.”
    4. The person with the biggest group doesn’t win. As a new group leader, I thought the goal was to have the biggest group. And we did. It was great. Everyone wanted to be in the groups my wife and I taught. We learned how to teach, we had fun with the students outside of Sunday School, and we hung out. No one ever told me that having the biggest group wasn’t the goal. What I should have been told was that the goal was to grow my group to the point I could start a new one. Another teacher could have then come along to shepherd and teach half my group.
    5. Your group exists for people far from God. One thing I learned about group life: if you aren’t careful, your group will turn inward pretty quickly. It takes strong leadership to constantly remind your group members that the group exists to reach new people. After a group has been together 18 months, it naturally begins to close. Reaching new people gets hard. You must consistently help your group see the many people in your community that might go to your church and attend your group if they were aware, invited, and cared for.
    6. Work hard to include new people in the group. People will not assimilate themselves. You have to work hard to help new people fit in, and your group members are the key. This is why it’s so important to become great at inclusion. It is possible to be a member of a group, but never really belong to the group. That’s a terrible feeling, and one reason people drift away and are never seen again.
    7. Your group isn’t your group. Read Amos 3:12. It contains a prophecy about Israel, and it is couched in shepherding terms. Part of this verse gives us insight into the life of a shepherd. “As the shepherd snatches an ear or a piece of a leg from the lion’s mouth…” tells us that shepherds protect their sheep. Nothing new there, right? Well, read the verse again; the sheep had already become lunch for the lion. Why would a shepherd risk life and limb for an animal that was already dead? The answer is, “Because the shepherd is not the owner of the sheep.” The true owner has temporarily given the shepherd responsibility for his sheep. If the shepherd goes out with 100 sheep, he’d better come back with 100, or have a good explanation (hence the reason he was so concerned about grabbing a piece of the sheep from the lion—it served as proof that he hadn’t stolen the sheep to begin his own flock). All this to say, as a group leader, the people in your group aren’t yours—you’re the stewarding shepherd. The “owner,” God, has given you temporary responsibility to care for His sheep—His people. Never use the words “my group” or “my classroom.” Everything belongs to God, not you. I needed to hear that as a new group leader.
    8. You should hold onto your group members with a loose grip. Because of #7 above, I must let people go if my group gets too large. The goal is to see people discipled, and that happens best in the context of smaller groups. Larger groups are fun to teach, and they can be a sign that you’re doing something right, but when the pastor asks you to divide your group so that greater care can be given to the members, do it! They aren’t “your” people anyway, right? Right.
    9. You should spend more time in prayer. Spending time with your group members is commendable. Spending time studying your lesson is also important. Doing ministry together as a group is important. But the most important thing you can do is to spend time in prayer. Pray for your pastor, pray for your group members, pray that the Lord protects you from the fiery darts of the evil one.
    10. Don’t do anything stupid to lose your position of leadership. In today’s world, someone is always watching. Always. Be mindful of the places you go, the things you look at online, and the words you use in social media. Everything you do is a potential skeleton in the closet years from now, and you don’t want to do anything that disqualifies you from serving the Lord. Too many ministers have learned this the hard way, and lifetimes of schooling, experience, and wisdom have all been erased instantly by a misspoken word, a lapse in moral or financial judgment, or some other reason. Finish the race you’ve begun. Don’t disqualify yourself. The church needs godly men and women now more than ever. Be strong. Be smart. Be one of the ones the Lord commends when He says, “Well done, good and faithful servant.” 

 

Group Leadership

A Republican, a Democrat, and a Murder Hornet Walk Into a Group…

By

Remember when “murder hornets” were the biggest thing we had to worry about in 2020?

With all that’s taken place in the first eight months of this year—COVID-19, lockdowns, racial injustice, protests, political tensions—it feels like we should all just take a beach vacation for the rest of the year.

Unfortunately, that’s not possible for most of us, so we’re now trying to navigate through more tension online and in-person than seemingly ever before.

If you haven’t felt it yet, just pop open Facebook, Twitter, or any app where people gather and voice their opinions.

It’s natural that those conversations and opinions are going to carry over to your small group. And that’s not always a bad thing.

We want people to be themselves while in our group, and part of that is allowing them to share anxieties and worries taking place in their lives.

The problem comes when those times of sharing turn divisive. Masks or no masks. Trump or Biden. Pandemic or hoax. Virtual or in-person church/school.

Passions spill over on each side, and winners and losers are staked out by the group.

However, the message of the gospel—the place where our groups should ultimately stake our flags—isn’t a message of divisiveness.

It’s a message of unity, borne from the fact we’re all unified in our need of a crucified and risen Savior to save us from our sins.

So the question becomes: How do we successfully lead a group of people through a gospel discussion who are deeply divided on the issues of the day? Here are five ideas.

1. SET CLEAR GROUND RULES.

Every group should have some type of covenant or agreement in place for expectations of how the group will function.

As a part of that agreement, ground rules should be set on how political issues will be handled and discussed when they come up.

Above all, every conversation must be filled with faith, hope, and love. If those three things aren’t present, the debate will have to stop.

2. ACKNOWLEDGE THERE ARE DIFFERENT OPINIONS IN THE GROUP.

If there’s more than one person in your group, I can almost guarantee there will be different opinions on hot-button issues. Just acknowledging that fact from the beginning will help alleviate some of the tension.

Determine that you’re not going to have political contests within the group. Contests create winners and losers. We’re all winners when we cling to the message of the gospel.

3. CONTINUE TO PRACTICE THE “ONE ANOTHERS” IN YOUR GROUP.

Pastor Derwin Gray recently wrote, “Jesus says that people will know we are His disciples by the way we love one another. Love doesn’t mean I approve of your sin. Love means I recognize your human dignity and worth.”

As we continue to practice the “one anothers” in our group, the more we will see our fellow brothers and sisters as children of God, not as political foes.

4. BE READY TO CALL A TRUCE.

There will be moments and issues where it’s impossible for everyone to be in agreement. It will be up to you then as the leader to call a truce and ask everyone to agree to disagree on the topic at hand.

Continuing to debate will take time and energy away from the core mission of the group to study God’s Word and make disciples. Know when it’s time to call it and move on.

5. KNOW WHEN TO TAKE A DISCUSSION OFFLINE.

There will be times when a heated discussion should be continued outside of the group meeting. If the debate has turned personal between group members, it’s best to step in and suggest returning to it at a different time.

Don’t let the conflict fester too long without resolution. More time and space can sometimes lead to more built-up pain. Hurt people will hurt people.

With all of these options, use Paul’s advice in Ephesians 4:32 as your guide: “And be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving one another, just as God also forgave you in Christ.”

Even in this most divisive of times in history, we’re all bonded together by the love God had for us by sending His one and only Son to die for us. We can all unite around that!

A version of this article first appeared at factsandtrends.net.

CHRIS SURRATT (@ChrisSurratt) is the discipleship and small groups specialist for LifeWay Christian Resources, a ministry consultant and coach with more than 20 years of experience, and the author of Leading Small Groups: How to Gather, Launch, Lead, and Multiply Your Small Group.

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