LifeWay

Group Ministry

Conversations on Group Practices

Church Leadership, Uncategorized

Tuesday Thoughts: The 4 D’s – The Dominator

By

If you lead a small group, the chances are good that you have at least one of what I call EGR’s. What does that stand for? Just extra grace required. Now those are people in your group that take just a little bit more of your patience, probably a little bit more of your time than everybody else. I still refer to these as the four D’s. See if you recognize any of these in your small group. The first one is the Dominator, then there’s the Dodger, the Debater, and finally the Drainer, and what I want to do for just a minute is talk about what do you do if you have a dominator in your small group. And that’s just somebody who tends to answer more questions and everybody else maybe turns the discussion back to themselves. They may be a seasoned Christian so they feel like they have more answers than everybody else. So what do you do if you have a dominator kind of dominating the conversation? Well, let me give you four things that you might try. The first one is just simply how the room is set up for the discussion of your group. You might try sitting right next to the person that dominates the conversation. There’s something about being that close of proximity to the person who’s answering or asking the questions that maybe slow them down a little bit before they jump into the conversation, so you might try that. Also, maybe make eye contact with other group members when you ask the question, especially those that have been introduced into the discussion yet and kind of with your body language invite them to answer the question before the person who usually jumps in as the dominator. And then you might also bring somebody into the conversation by calling up their name, asking them specifically to answer the question. Make sure that it’s something that there’ll be able to answer, maybe more of an open ended question, but invite them in before the person who dominates is able to jump in and if none of that works, it’s always good to meet outside of the group time. Maybe grab some coffee or meet them in the lobby after church and just sit down and explain the mission and the vision of the small group. So that’s some things that you might try if you have a dominator in your small group.

Chris Surratt is a ministry consultant and coach with more than twenty years of experience serving the local church. Chris served on the Executive Teams at Cross Point Church in Nashville, TN., and Seacoast Church in Charleston, S.C., prior to becoming the Discipleship and Small Groups Specialist for LifeWay Christian Resources. He is the author of Small Groups for the Rest of Us: How to Design Your Small Groups System to Reach the Fringes. You can follow his blog at www.chrissurratt.com.

 

Church Leadership, Uncategorized

Five Hints for Doing Prayer Requests Rightly in Your Group

By

One of the challenges of leading a Bible study group is managing the time dedicated to prayer requests. I bet you’ve been a part of a group where prayer requests seemed to take a lot of the group’s time. Don’t get me wrong—I’m a big fan of prayer! But as group leaders, you and I must learn to manage the limited time we have with our group members. In order to devote time in the group to Bible study, fellowship, prayer, and other activities, consider the following ways to manage your group’s prayer requests:

  1. Assign the prayer requests. Oftentimes, I will write prayer requests on the marker board in my group’s meeting place at the church. I then ask group members to volunteer to pray for just one of the requests out loud.
  1. Use “the basket method.” Use index cards (one per person) and ask group members to write down their prayer requests, write their name and contact information on the card, and place them in a basket. Pass the basket around the group, asking volunteers to take one of the index cards, pray for the need, and then contact the person during the week to let them know their request is being prayed for.
  1. Pray in smaller groups. It can be intimidating to pray out loud in a big group, so consider dividing your group into smaller groups, maybe 4-6 people max, for the purpose of sharing requests and praying.
  1. Email them later. After hearing your group member’s prayer requests (and writing them down, of course), set aside time after your group’s Bible study and send out the requests via email (if I write them down on a marker board, I simply use my smartphone to capture a picture of the requests). That way, everyone in the group will have a current list of the group’s prayer requests.
  1. Use email to generate the prayer requests. On occasion when I can see that the Bible study is going to run long, I will say something like, “I’ll send an email to the group later today, and summarize the study for us and those who were not here today. If you have a prayer need this week, just “reply all” and let us know what it is. We’ll jump into action and begin praying for you.” I then control the length of the prayer time by simply praying for the Lord’s blessing on the group, our study time together, and those not present. When I’m running short on time, this allows me to complete the Bible study, but still make sure that people’s prayer requests are prayed for during the week.

Ken Braddy manages LifeWay’s Ongoing Bible studies, leads his church’s groups ministry, and blogs daily on Sunday School and small groups at kenbraddy.com.

Uncategorized

Unleashing Creative Group Worship

By

by Reid Smith

Although everyone would agree worship is an essential part of our spiritual life, many leaders wrestle with how to incorporate it into their group time without it feeling forced or awkward. One of the ways you can “break the ice” is to help your group members expand their understanding of what worship can look like beyond the church service. For example, worship can mean being still before God and listening for His voice, reflecting on Psalms, or listing things that you are thankful for.

In other words, don’t try to replicate a weekend worship service in your group. Rather, discover ways the people you circle up with can worship together that fits your group’s unique dynamic and personality. Gradually introduce new forms of worship by offering a few suggestions from the list below and getting a sense as to which one your group resonates with the most.

  1. Invite your group members to think of something that feels ordinary in their daily lives, but for which they are grateful. This could include a roof over their head, daily provision for food, their spouse, or their job.Then have each person express their thanks for that person or thing within the group. After everyone shares, let your group know you just had a time of worship by humbling yourselves before God and giving thanks (Psalm 69:30).
  1. Ask your group to reflect on the names of God found in Scripture. Have them share the names of God that stand out to them. Simply Google, “list of names of God in the Bible” if you’d like to give them a list to jump-start their thinking.
  1. Play worship music and ponder the lyrics. Choose a song or two that is especially meaningful to you. As you play it, have your group simply listen intently to the lyrics and reflect upon God’s goodness. Afterwards, invite them to share a word or thought that struck them while listening. Be the first to share, and watch how the Lord uses this to help people express worshipful thanksgiving.
  1. Read a Gospel account of Jesus’ death and resurrection and invite your group to reflect on God’s love for each of them and the world (John 3:16-17). Expand on this time by celebrating communion together (1 Corinthians 11:23-26).
  1. Read through Psalms 23, 63 or 64 and then invite people to share what was personally significant to them.
  1. Attend your church’s weekend service or a special event where you can worship the Lord together.
  1. Plan together to participate in a local outreach. Discuss how serving “the least of these” is itself worship and touches God’s heart (Matthew 25:37-40).
  1. Identify something in your current study that you are encouraged to contend for and stand together against the enemy, renounce sin, or proclaim God’s promises. As a group, you can read through Ephesians 6:10-18, Colossians 2:13-15, 1 Peter 5:8-9, Hebrews 12:1-3, or 2 Corinthians 1:20-22.
  1. Invite your group members to bring a picture to your next meeting that’s important to them and be prepared to share how it reflects God’s faithfulness in their lives and what they’re believing God for. Pray together afterwards.
  1. Read biblical references of different kinds of worship such as clapping, raising hands, and bowing down (i.e., 2 Samuel 6:5, 14-15; Psalm 149, 150). Purposefully expose your group to various flavors of worship and talk about what you all think this says about God’s heart for worship.

Worship is a vital aspect of biblical community, and the Holy Spirit will help you lead your group to God’s throne of grace (Acts 2:47, Hebrews 4:14-16). As the group leader, be spontaneous and vulnerable in praising God because this will empower others to do the same when they’re ready.

Reid Smith has been equipping leaders in churches of all sizes and stages of growth for effective disciple-making since 1996. He lives in Wellington, Florida where he serves as a Groups Pastor at Christ Fellowship. You can find more of his helpful resources at www.reidsmith.org.

Uncategorized

The Church: United in Christ

By

A church is a group of people from many different walks of life, backgrounds, and interests who find their unity in the gospel of Jesus Christ. At times divisions occur in the church. When we let our preferences get in the way of our mission, believers are unnecessarily divided.

First Corinthians mentions several areas of potential division in a church: leaders, immorality in the church, going to secular court against fellow believers, marriage, meat offered to idols, conduct of women in the church, the Lord’s Supper, spiritual gifts, and Jesus’ resurrection. Paul’s fatherly love for this church drove him to confront its problems and to call it back to unity in Christ.

Believers Should Be United through Christ

In 1 Corinthians 1:10 Paul called the church to unity in three ways.

1. They should agree with one another. Unity comes through a common confession of the gospel—Jesus Christ and Him crucified (see 2:2). Paul was calling the believers to doctrinal and theological unity.

2. There should be no divisions among the Corinthian Christians. Paul was calling them to relational unity based on their identity in Jesus Christ. The Corinthian believers were to be united together in Christ, not divided into factions that separated them from one another.

3. The church should be perfectly united in mind and thought. Paul was calling them to missional unity, reminding them that there’s no room for disagreement about the nature of the gospel or the mission to be ambassadors of God’s reconciling work in Christ (see 2 Cor. 5:16-21).

All Believers Belong to Christ

In 1 Corinthians 1:11-12 Paul addressed quarrels that threatened the church. Some members claimed to belong to Paul, some to Apollos, some to Cephas, and some to Christ. However, the truth is that all believers belong to Christ.

Believers Must Put Jesus before All Other Leaders

Paul’s contempt for the church’s rivalry and division is clear in 1 Corinthians 1:13-15. Even though Paul laid a foundation as a skilled builder of the Corinthian church (see 3:10), he wasn’t interested in building his own little kingdom. He was an apostle of Jesus who preached Christ only and Christ sufficient so that Christ’s kingdom could flourish. He said the Corinthians should think of him and Apollos as servants of Christ and as managers of the mysteries of God (see 4:1). Nothing more, nothing less. We ought to think of leaders we respect in this way as well.

All Believers Share the Same Salvation

In 1 Corinthians 1:18-23 Paul was contending with two objections to the message of the gospel.

1. Jews asked for signs. For the Jews, the cross was identified with a curse, not a blessing (see Deut. 21:23; Gal. 3:13). For this reason the cross is “a stumbling block to the Jews” (v. 23); it’s a divisive claim on God’s behalf.

2. Greeks sought wisdom. Paul’s argument compared the wisdom of the world with the wisdom of God. For the Greeks, wisdom meant the teachings of their pagan philosophers. Because the gospel didn’t meet the logical standards of their thinkers, they rejected it as foolishness.

“We preach Christ crucified,” Paul said in verse 23. This claim, at its heart, is divisive to the world, but to those God has called, it’s God’s wisdom and power. The cross divides because the world seeks its own way, but the only way to God is through His crucified Son.

For Paul, the cross of Christ was a rallying point and unifier for the church. There should be no disagreement, disunity, or division about that among God’s people. There’s no higher authority than our Lord, who Himself prayed that His followers would live in unity with one another (see John 17:20-23).

This article is an excerpt from the Bible study Explore the Bible: 1 Corinthians—Remember Who We Are by Clint Pressley.

Scripture quotations are taken from the Christian Standard Bible®, Copyright © 2017 by Holman Bible Publishers®. Used by permission. Christian Standard Bible® and CSB® are federally registered trademarks of Holman Bible Publishers.

Group Leadership, Uncategorized

How to Know When to Quit Your Small Group

By

The decision to quit your small group is a difficult one. I have faced this decision before, and the people pleaser in me shuddered at the thought of announcing my departure—especially to a group I have grown to love, with women who have encouraged me in my spiritual walk.

So how do you know if you should quit your small group? How do you know when “it’s time”? Below are five indicators of when you need to move on.

  1. If you’re no longer “growing.” We should not confuse small groups with churches. One of the biggest grievances against the Millennial generation (and rightly so) is our church unfaithfulness. As soon as the worship starts to get dull, or the preaching gets a little uncomfortable, or the pastor asks us to tithe—we bolt. This is a separate matter entirely from the small group. Robert Tew once said, “Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy.” While this quote misses entirely the point of servant leadership, a small truth can be gleaned from it: walk away from a small group where you are no longer growing. If you start to feel stagnant, complacent, or unchallenged, maybe it’s time you consider a new group where you are discipled and you become the best “you” you can be.
  2. Follow the 2- to 3-year “rule.” While this isn’t a hard-and-fast rule, small groups by nature are transient. We weren’t made to stay in the same place forever. Eventually, when new seasons of life come, you move on to a new set of friends. You change jobs. You change schools. You change social circles. It’s natural. It’s healthy. It’s part of the cyclical nature of life. The same is true of small groups. If you’ve been in a group for a few years, consider some new people you could minister to, or vice versa.
  3. If the group isn’t rooted in Scripture. This is a big one. The longer a small group is together, the more tempting it is for group members to become comfortable with one another—and complacent in their study. They move on to self-help books rather than books of the Bible. Prayer requests become gossip exchanges. “Catching up” is confused for “discipleship.” If any or all of these habits have become common practice in your small group, move on.
  4. Question your motives. If you feel the desire to leave, let’s not place all the blame on your small group. Maybe it’s you that has changed. Ask yourself: Why am I in this group? What do I hope to gain? What are the pros and cons of staying? Question your motives. If your motives aren’t based in your spiritual growth, maybe you need to move on and adopt new motives.
  5. Set a new goal. With the first two months of the new year nearly behind us, take a personal inventory of your New Year’s Resolutions. How have you been progressing? What have you been slacking in? Where have you been compromising your values? Most importantly, how has your discipleship experience changed since the New Year? If you’re not satisfied with the answers to these questions, it’s time to adjust your habits to reflect your values—or it’s time to set an even better goal for the remainder of the year.

Caroline Case is a proud Nashville transplant from Naples, Florida, who serves as the Production Editor for LifeWay’s SmallGroup.com and Discipleship in Context teams. Caroline has a Bachelor of Communication from Palm Beach Atlantic University in West Palm Beach, FL. She is pursuing her Master of Arts in English at Belmont University in Nashville, where she will go on to pursue her doctorate and teach.

Friday Features, Uncategorized

Connected Through Prayer

By

Introduction

It has been said that there is only one person in the kingdom who can wake up the king at midnight to ask for a glass of water without fear of being punished—the king’s kid. Through faith in Jesus, we are the King’s kid. Yet we often forget that we have been invited to have limitless interactions with an infinite God. Whether it is because we take it for granted or we allow ourselves to be wrapped up in earthly things, we often neglect and fail to enjoy this tremendous gift of prayer.

As we take a closer look at Jesus’ life, it quickly becomes apparent that Jesus consistently responded to God the Father’s invitation to interact with Him. Whether Jesus was alone or with others, He was constantly aware of the Father and engaged in continual conversations with Him. Time with God was a critical high priority in Jesus’ life.

In the same way that Jesus interacted with God, so too can we. Prayer is far more than
a one-way monologue, listing our wishes before God. Instead, prayer can be as dynamic, intimate, and engaging as the way we interact with those closest to us. Prayer involves waiting, listening, remembering, affirming, pleading, petitioning, thanking, confessing, worshiping, and so much more.

To get off on the right foot, we must remember a foundational aspect of prayer:
Prayer doesn’t actually begin with us; it begins with God. God has already initiated an interaction with us through a variety of ways and means but most fully through His Son, Jesus. Through faith in Christ, we have become the beloved child of the King, who is always welcoming us into His presence. Because prayer is a continuous response to God’s interaction, we can have confidence that God hears, knows, and is present to our interactions with Him. Though it may feel like we’re the ones initiating the conversation and God is silent, the truth is God is always waiting and inviting us to engage with Him. He is ready, willing, and able to listen, not just to our words but also to our hearts.

Discuss for a moment the ways in which we interact with those closest to us. 

Does this description of prayer—our response to God’s constant invitation to interact with Him—differ from your perspective of it? If so, how? 

KNOW THE STORY 

Though you can find numerous examples of Jesus interacting with God throughout the Bible, probably the most famous prayer in all of Scripture is the prayer that Jesus taught His disciples. This is the centerpiece amid the set of foundational teachings on a variety of topics addressed by Christ, commonly referred to as the Sermon on the Mount.

5 “Whenever you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites, because they love to pray standing in the synagogues and
on the street corners to be seen by people. Truly I tell you, they have their reward. 6 But when you pray, go into your private room, shut your door, and pray to your Father who is in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you. 7 When you pray, don’t babble like the Gentiles, since they imagine they’ll be heard for their many words. 8 Don’t be like them, because your Father knows the things you need before you ask him. 9 Therefore, you should pray like this: Our Father in heaven,
your name be honored as holy.
10 Your kingdom come. Your will be done
11 on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us today our daily bread.
12 And forgive us our debts,
as we also have forgiven our debtors. 13 And do not bring us into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one. – Matthew 6:5-13

Discuss the differences you see between verses 5-8 and 9-13. 

When you read this prayer, what is mentioned that resonates most with what you need from God right now? 

This was an excerpt from Disciples Path: The Journey – Volume 3, Session 2. You can purchase it here.

Church Leadership, Group Leadership, Uncategorized

The Lord is Close to the Brokenhearted

By

Psalm 34:18 teaches us that the Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Scripture also tells us that Jesus has overcome the world.

In light of the recent tragedy in Parkland, Florida, group leaders across America now have an opportunity to speak life and the truth of the gospel into members of their group that are hurting and broken or wondering how to feel. Click the links below to download two free Bible studies we hope will be helpful to you as you navigate this time with your groups this week.

God’s Embrace in Our Grief

Suffering Well with Others

Group Leadership, Uncategorized

Why Should Kindness Be Random?

By

I’m not a fan of random acts of kindness. Don’t write me off as a curmudgeon. After all, my dad did raise me right.

  • I hold the door open for people (not just women, thank you).
  • I speak politely to the high school kid working the drive-thru.
  • I rescue baby bunnies from the dietary plans of my beagle.

When a need for kindness is right in front of me, I should take it. That’s biblical.  Followers of Christ are commanded to clothe themselves with kindness (Col. 3:12). Kindness is part of the fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22-23).

We’re not being random when we encounter someone who could obviously use some kindness.

Jesus told a story about a man who did an incredible act of kindness for a stranger. The parable of the Good Samaritan is about a Jew and a Samaritan, two men Jesus’ audience would have considered enemies. It was obvious to the Samaritan that the Jew was in a bad way–beaten and robbed–and he helped. That’s true kindness.

Kindness is seeing a need and responding in a good, gracious way that truly benefits the person. That captures the meaning of the Greek word and how it was used in the New Testament.

It may feel kind to us to pay for the coffee of the person in line behind us, but the guy spending $4.75 for a skinny white vanilla latte probably is not in need of someone buying his coffee.

The Samaritan didn’t pay to the lodging bill for everyone; he paid for the one who needed it.

Let’s be kind—but let’s be intentional in our kindness. Do it for those who could use the help or who need the encouragement. Don’t just be nice; through your intentional act of kindness, build a relationship. Show them the love of Christ in the process. And do it to honor Jesus.

 

Lynn Pryor is a team leader for adult resources at LifeWay. He and his wife, Mary, lead a Bible study group for young adults and have survived raising two sons to adulthood. A graduate of Southwestern Seminary, Lynn has previously pastored and served churches in Texas. Read more from his blog at lynnhpryor.com.

 

 

 

Group Leadership, Uncategorized

The Top 3 Bible Studies to Start Your New Year

By

Make 2018 a year of true change. Base your resolutions on the Word of God.

Just about everyone is going to make some promise to themselves to do something in the New Year: lose a few pounds, break a bad habit, start a good one…

There’s nothing wrong with setting goals. But this year, resolve to do something with a higher purpose. Something that has eternal weight and significance. Something your entire small group can get behind.

Here are three resolutions and the Bible studies that can help you achieve them.

This year, resolve to… 

… learn how to pray.

Pray Like This

Prayer is the most dynamic discipline in the life of a believer. Yet it may be the most misunderstood and the least taught. This six-session Bible study explores the text, theology, and application of the Lord’s Prayer. It includes video sessions with trusted Christian leaders such as J. D. Greear, Ronnie Floyd, Ken Hemphill, Kie Bowman, and Robby Gallaty. As you take a fresh look at the way Jesus taught His followers to pray, you’ll develop a more vibrant prayer life that leads to worship, spiritual maturity, great dependence on God, and a knowledge of His will. (6 sessions)

… effectively defend your faith.

 

Jesus Among Secular Gods

As belief in the secular gods of atheism, hedonism, relativism, and humanism continues to grow, it’s more important than ever for believers to be able to defend the claims of Christ. This six-session Bible study challenges the popular and trending philosophies of the day, skillfully pointing out the fallacies in their claims and presenting compelling evidence for absolute truth as found in Jesus and revealed in Scripture. Learn how to share your faith in a culture of opposing worldviews and articulate why you believe Jesus stands tall above all other gods. (6 sessions)

… read through the Bible.

 

Foundations

Read through all of the key, foundational passages of the Bible in one year, while still having the flexibility of reading 5 days per week. Along with supplementary devotional content each day, you can experience the miracle of reading and responding to God’s Word. By using the H.E.A.R. journaling method, you will be guided through Highlighting, Explaining, Applying, and Responding to passages, allowing for practical application throughout the year-long plan.

Uncategorized

Celebrating the New Year With Your Group

By

The new year always brings feelings of hope and excitement for what’s possible in the next season of life. There’s nothing specifically different about the actual day or month, but we often use it to reset our life goals and aspirations. It’s a great time to kick off that fitness goal, or Bible reading plan, or debt retiring budget.

The hard part is continuing the momentum into February and beyond. Those aspirational goals often become forgotten promises halfway through March. That’s why fitness gyms always plan on selling more memberships than they can handle. They know January’s crowds will settle back to normal levels soon.

Since one of the keys to sticking with a goal is accountability, why not build it into your group experience this year? Research shows that it takes around 21 days for a habit to form. Use this first month of 2018 to help your group build and keep those new productive habits. Here are a few ideas to kick the new year off right with your group.

  • Commit to a daily Bible reading plan through January. There are great plans available through online tools like YouVersion.com, and you can keep each other accountable through the app.
  • Go through a financial planning study as a group. A group study like Financial Peace University can help establish biblical financial habits with built-in accountability.
  • Commit to a balanced discipleship plan for the year. You can see an example of one here.
  • Have fun with a group fitness goal. This can be a weight loss challenge (use percentages), or a weekly boot camp class that the group attends together. A group that sweats together, loses pounds together.

Make this the year that personal goals were met because they were tackled as a group. You might also have some fun in the process.

Chris Surratt is a ministry consultant and coach with over 23 years of experience serving the local church. Chris served on the Executive Team at Cross Point Church in Nashville, TN, and was on staff at Seacoast Church in Charleston, SC, for 15 years. He is also the Small Group Specialist for LifeWay Christian Resources. Chris’s first book, Small Groups For The Rest Of Us: How to Design Your Small Groups System to Reach the Fringes, was recently released by Thomas Nelson. You can follow his blog at chrissurratt.com or follow him on Twitter @chrissurratt.