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Tuesday Thoughts: Being on Mission

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Okay, we’re talking about the three distinctions of a biblical small group, if you remember. The first one is discipleship, so we want to make sure that we are creating disciples in our small group. Second, we want to make sure that we’re building community, that discipleship happens best within the context of community, so we want to schedule it into our group meetings and into our calendar. And then third, what I want to focus on today is mission. How can we make sure that our group is on mission? So I’m gonna give you four things to maybe look at to think about for your group to help your group to start thinking missionally. The first thing you want to do is you want to study it.

Choose study that forces your group to think missionally. Lot of the studies that we do are something that we’re passionate about, so kind of revert back to the same types of topics. So if you’re not naturally, if your group’s not naturally bent towards being on mission, choose a study that forces them to think about serving people outside of themselves. So maybe you go to lifeway.com, look at the balance discipleship plan and choose a steady from the serving God and others category, something that’s about six weeks long and take some time to study what does it look like to be on mission and then number two you want to plan for it.

Choose somebody in your group that will organize something that you can do maybe on a weekend and something that fits the skills of your group. So choose somebody, talk about it, talk about where are we skilled, and then pick a project for your group to start with to start thinking outside of the group. And the number three, it’s pretty obvious, but we want to do it. So actually make it happen. We can study it, we can plan for it, but if we don’t actually go out and do it than it was for nothing. And so make sure you get a good day and time when the entire group can do something. Maybe a weekend, Saturday morning, a couple hours where you can serve alongside another organization and become missional. The number four, and this is important and we forget this part a lot of times, is talk about it. So as soon as possible, maybe the next group meeting after your project, take some time to debrief. How did it go? How did it make you feel? What can we do differently or better next time? Because what we want to do is we want to move the mindset from a project to a lifestyle. So we go from just thinking about how do we do this project to how do we actually live missionally day by day. So study it, plan for it, do it, talk about it, and let’s become missional as a small group.

Chris Surratt is a ministry consultant and coach with over 22 years of experience serving the local church. Chris served on the Executive Team at Cross Point Church in Nashville, TN, and was on staff at Seacoast Church in Charleston, SC, for 15 years. He is also the Small Group Specialist for LifeWay Christian Resources. Chris’s first book, Small Groups For The Rest Of Us: How to Design Your Small Groups System to Reach the Fringes, was just released by Thomas Nelson. You can follow his blog at chrissurratt.com or follow him on Twitter @chrissurratt.

Group Leadership, Start New Groups

Small Groups that Live Sent

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by Eddie Mosley

Do you have objectives for your small groups? Is the vision clear for group leaders and members? Over the last few years, some churches have helped groups know and remember their purpose by adding descriptive purpose words to the title of their groups. Life Groups, Community Groups, Bible Study Groups, or Missional Groups.  This last title caught my attention, as it not only helps to clarify the biblical purpose of groups, but it also aligns well with my church’s purpose statement, Find Life-Live Sent. We need to address the “new movement” and how to be sure our groups are accomplishing this purpose. What about your groups?

You already know that small groups are not limited to Bible study, community, service, or support; they are designed to be an environment that enables life transformation for Christ followers. So how do you help your groups remember their purpose? What are some steps you take to evaluate your groups’ accomplishment of this purpose? Through research at our church, we discovered two catalysts that stand out as life transformation experiences, as well as which groups can be essential in helping to walk through with their members. The two catalysts are mission trips (Live Sent) and life crises. While we can’t plan a life crisis, groups can be there for the individual. But we can schedule, plan, and promote opportunities for members to Live Sent via mission trips!

There is a motto you will hear often around my church: “The more you grow the more you serve. The more you serve the more you grow.” Knowing the results of the research, we knew we had to plan mission trips and encourage participation for more than just helping another church, city or community. The motivation had to clearly communicate that this experience had the potential of changing the participants’ lives, as well as serving the churches and communities for which the trip was planned. To increase the emphasis on the importance of missional efforts of groups, we challenged every small group leader to participate in a mission experience within the next two years. If for some reason the leader could not serve on a mission experience, the group was asked to sponsor someone from the group to represent their group.

This challenge was met with mixed responses, but in the end a large percentage of groups were able to meet the challenge. Celebration of what God was doing in and through the mission trips was communicated over the years at each leadership training event and weekly newsletter, which included stories from the various trips. 

How can you help your groups live missionally?
How can you partner with your missions ministry area to plan ahead and promote mission opportunities?
What could be a goal for your church’s groups to Live Sent over the next two years?

Eddie has served as Small Groups Pastor at LifePoint Church, a multi-site campus in Smyrna, TN, since 2005. His enthusiasm for seeing life change happen in the lives of individuals in his church, neighborhood and community is infectious. Eddie is author of Connecting in Communities, Understanding the Dynamics of Small Groups and various other articles on practical approaches to reaching people for Bible study. Eddie earned a MDiv at Southern Seminary and a DMin at New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. He is a sought after speaker for small group ministry as well as neighborhood impact. His passion is to help pastors and leaders develop strategy to implement Small Groups in the local church which build community that impacts their communities. 

Group Leadership, Uncategorized

Why Should Kindness Be Random?

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I’m not a fan of random acts of kindness. Don’t write me off as a curmudgeon. After all, my dad did raise me right.

  • I hold the door open for people (not just women, thank you).
  • I speak politely to the high school kid working the drive-thru.
  • I rescue baby bunnies from the dietary plans of my beagle.

When a need for kindness is right in front of me, I should take it. That’s biblical.  Followers of Christ are commanded to clothe themselves with kindness (Col. 3:12). Kindness is part of the fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22-23).

We’re not being random when we encounter someone who could obviously use some kindness.

Jesus told a story about a man who did an incredible act of kindness for a stranger. The parable of the Good Samaritan is about a Jew and a Samaritan, two men Jesus’ audience would have considered enemies. It was obvious to the Samaritan that the Jew was in a bad way–beaten and robbed–and he helped. That’s true kindness.

Kindness is seeing a need and responding in a good, gracious way that truly benefits the person. That captures the meaning of the Greek word and how it was used in the New Testament.

It may feel kind to us to pay for the coffee of the person in line behind us, but the guy spending $4.75 for a skinny white vanilla latte probably is not in need of someone buying his coffee.

The Samaritan didn’t pay to the lodging bill for everyone; he paid for the one who needed it.

Let’s be kind—but let’s be intentional in our kindness. Do it for those who could use the help or who need the encouragement. Don’t just be nice; through your intentional act of kindness, build a relationship. Show them the love of Christ in the process. And do it to honor Jesus.

 

Lynn Pryor is a team leader for adult resources at LifeWay. He and his wife, Mary, lead a Bible study group for young adults and have survived raising two sons to adulthood. A graduate of Southwestern Seminary, Lynn has previously pastored and served churches in Texas. Read more from his blog at lynnhpryor.com.

 

 

 

Group Leadership

Four Steps to Becoming a Serving Small Group

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One of the churches in which I served sat on an interesting place geographically. The side of the main road where the building sat was quickly gentrifying: grand homes were being restored and flipped for big dollars, and the neighborhood was becoming a desirable place to live again.

However, directly across the street was a completely different picture. Drugs and gangs were destroying families, and the crime rate was one of the highest in the entire city. While we felt pretty comfortable being on the “right side of the street,” we knew we couldn’t just sit and watch the pain occurring on the other side of our windows. This tension eventually led to a 24/7 Dream Center with a food pantry, dental clinic, after-school tutoring, free legal services, and much more, but it started with a handful of small groups who decided to love on and adopt a dying community. Those groups would consistently show up every month to walk the streets and offer basic needs, like lightbulbs, to as many houses that would open their doors. That community continues to change because those first few small groups took action.

Changing a community is an admirable goal for a small group, but where do you start? How do you turn your group from inward to outward focused?

Here are four steps to becoming a serving small group.

1. Serve your group.

If you expect your small group to become a serving group, you have to first model servant leadership for your group members. You can follow the example of Jesus with his small group. He served his disciples for over a year before releasing them to do ministry. As you start, make sure you serve them unconditionally and tangibly. There are no expectations attached with true servanthood.

2. Enable group members to serve the group

Even the disciples had to eventually turn over ownership to their quickly multiplying group.

In those days, as the disciples were increasing in number, there arose a complaint by the Hellenistic Jews against the Hebraic Jews that their widows were being overlooked in the daily distribution. The Twelve summoned the whole company of the disciples and said, “It would not be right for us to give up preaching the word of God to wait on tables. Brothers and sisters, select from among you seven men of good reputation, full of the Spirit and wisdom, whom we can appoint to this duty. But we will devote ourselves to prayer and to the ministry of the word.”
– Acts 6:1-4

You are discipling your group members by helping them discover their spiritual gifts in order to utilize within the group. Here are a few roles to start giving away:

  • Hosting the group
  • Providing the food
  • Facilitating the discussion
  • Handling the prayer time
  • Planning events
  • Planning missional opportunities

Spend a group meeting talking about where group members gifts and passions are, and then release them to own that portion of the group experience.

3. Serve together in the church

There are always opportunities for groups to serve somewhere together in the church. A classroom needs to be painted. The church landscaping needs some extra care on a Saturday. The student ministry needs more bodies for an event. Take a few minutes at a group meeting to brainstorm ideas where the group can come alongside a ministry within the church.

4. Serve together in the community

Just like our small groups saw a need across the street and met it, there are needs around your community. A single mom that needs her yard mowed. An under-resourced local school that needs more supplies for the teachers. A local fire or police station that could use some encouragement through baked cookies. Whatever you do may seem small or insignificant, but you have to start somewhere. The only way a community is going to be transformed is through one block at a time, by one small group at a time.

 

Chris Surratt is a ministry consultant and coach with over 22 years of experience serving the local church. Chris served on the Executive Team at Cross Point Church in Nashville, TN, and was on staff at Seacoast Church in Charleston, SC, for 15 years. He is also the Small Group Specialist for LifeWay Christian Resources. Chris’s first book, Small Groups For The Rest Of Us: How to Design Your Small Groups System to Reach the Fringes, was just released by Thomas Nelson. You can follow his blog at chrissurratt.com or follow him on Twitter @chrissurratt.

 

Group Leadership

National Do Something Nice Day: Why Should Kindness Be Random?

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October 5th is National Do Something Nice Day. It’s a nice sentiment (no pun intended), but it sounds like I’m off the hook the rest of the year. Shouldn’t we be nice all the time? National Do Something Nice Day right up there with February 17th’s Random Acts of Kindness Day.
I’m not a fan of random acts of kindness. Don’t write me off as a curmudgeon. After all, my dad did raise me right.

  • I hold the door open for people (not just women, thank you).
  • I speak politely to the high school kid working the drive-thru.
  • I rescue baby bunnies from the dietary plans of my beagle.

When a need for kindness is right in front of me, I should take it. That’s biblical. Followers of Christ are commanded to clothe themselves with kindness (Col. 3:12). Kindness is part of the fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22-23).

We’re not being random when we encounter someone who could obviously use some kindness.

Jesus told a story about a man who did an incredible act of kindness for a stranger. The parable of the Good Samaritan is about a Jew and a Samaritan, two men Jesus’ audience would have considered enemies. It was obvious to the Samaritan that the Jew was in a bad way—beaten and robbed—and he helped. That’s true kindness.

Kindness is seeing a need and responding in a good, gracious way that benefits the one being helped. This captures the meaning of the Greek word and how it was used in the New Testament.

It may feel kind to us to pay for the coffee of the person in line behind us, but the guy spending $4.75 for a skinny white vanilla latte probably is not in need of someone buying his coffee.

The Samaritan didn’t pay the lodging bill for everyone—he paid for the one who needed it.

Let’s be kind and let’s be nice—but let’s be intentional about it. Do it for those who could use the help or who need the encouragement. Don’t just be nice; through your intentional act of kindness, build a relationship. Show them the love of Christ in the process. Do it to honor Jesus, not to honor a national holiday.

Dr. Lynn Pryor really is kind—even nice. He leads the team at LifeWay Christian Resources that produces the ongoing Bible study curriculum Bible Studies for Life. Follow him lynnhpryor.com.

Group Leadership

A Homeless Man Threw Away My Sandwich

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One time a homeless man threw away my sandwich.

I offered the sandwich, he flung the sandwich, and I never saw serving the same. It was just one moment and one guy and one sandwich, but it shaped the way I served for years.

I was involved in a young adult group that prepared and packaged PB&Js for homeless people once a week. Most of the sandwich recipients were grateful for the generic grape and off-brand creamy on white that we wrapped up and passed out downtown.

Most, but not all.

They all had troubled pasts—bad decisions, drug dependencies, or broken minds. But some responded to the gift with gratitude, while others threw the sandwich on the ground and made demands.

This instance, my most problematic PB&J exchange ever, made me wonder if we should just leave the homeless alone. I was handing sandwiches to a large group of guys and several said “thanks.” But one, immediately and angrily said, “Man, I don’t want this.” Then, he fiercely flung it at the trashcan nearby (he missed) and said, “You got any money?”

Wait. That’s not how this is supposed to work, right?

So a sinner rejected my sandwich. This guy was homeless, but he trashed my snack and asked for cash I didn’t have.

I felt like a failure.
Then, I felt angry.
And then, I stopped serving sinners.

Loving bad people can be frustrating. Serving sinners who waste your work can feel like a waste of time. As leaders, positioning our groups to shape culture through gospel-fueled acts of service is challenging, especially when the people we serve need to be served because of their own sin.

I’m sure your group has faced the question, “Who should we help?” “Who should we love?” “Who can we trust not to use us and waste our work as we try to be like Jesus?”

Will our group serve bad people? I’ve certainly asked this question. I mean, a homeless man wasted my sandwich.

Thank God Jesus isn’t like me.

We see people who are homeless and we judge their circumstances. But Jesus sees a heart He wants to bring home. We see dads with no relationship with their children because they were bad fathers. Jesus sees a son He wants to save. We see co-workers lose their jobs because of dishonesty or selfish ambition. Jesus sees someone working for something they can only find in Him.

In those types of circumstances, we often don’t really want to help. We ask, “Who sinned?”

He wouldn’t be homeless if he wasn’t a sinner. He would have a family if he wasn’t a bad person. She would have a job if she wasn’t wicked.

Who wants to listen to those people?
Who wants to help?

Jesus does. Jesus wants to listen. Jesus wants to serve.

“None is righteous, no, not one…” – Romans 3:10
“While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” – Romans 5-8

Jesus serves even though we’ve all thrown sandwiches. If Jesus only listened to the needs of people who deserved none of the blame for their problems, He’d never listen to anybody. If Jesus only helped with the hurts of the innocent, He would never help anyone and would never have left heaven in the first place.

But Jesus listened and Jesus served and Jesus loves. Let your group serve bad people. It’s not a waste; it’s a picture of the gospel. We have all squandered grace, yet still we are loved to the depths in Christ.

Brandon Hiltibidal is a former church planter and multi-site pastor, and he is now part of the Groups Ministry team at LifeWay Christian Resources. He and his wife have three little girls and lead a community group at The Bridge Church in Spring Hill, TN.

Group Leadership

Four Activities For Your Groups This Summer

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Summer is officially here, and that means your small group meeting schedule will probably get interrupted for the next three months—and that’s OK. We all need seasonal changes of pace to keep things fresh. Mark Batterson says, “A change of pace + a change of place = a change of perspective.” A summer of not meeting every week in a home or classroom will give your leaders time to recharge and be inspired for the fall groups semester. In the meantime, although groups may not be meeting every week for a study, they should stay connected. Here are four summer activities that can keep groups engaged.
1. Have fun!
Go to a ballgame. Celebrate the Fourth of July fireworks together. Get together for a picnic. Race cars at an amusement park. We can sometimes suck all of the fun out of group life, and summer is a great time to put it back in. Encourage your groups to create memories this summer through just having fun together.
2. Go on a short-term missions trip together.
Nothing bonds a group better than being on mission together. The trip does not have to be international—there are massive needs in communities all around us. Partner with an organization that is already making a difference in that community and take your groups on a weekend missions trip.
3. Serve a local missions organization.
There are food pantries, youth centers, and other missional organizations in almost every community. Pick out a Saturday in June or July to serve as a group. If it’s a great experience with an organization making a real difference, commit to an ongoing relationship.
4. Do an online study.
Choose a study on smallgroup.com. But instead of meeting together every week for the discussion, set up a Facebook group page to go through it online. Your group members can watch the video on their own, and then post comments on the page. A great study to try this summer would be “Crazy Grace for Crazy Times” by Pastor Derwin Gray.
By getting creative and thinking outside of the small group box, your group members can still stay engaged in community this summer.

Group Leadership

Small Groups and Adoptive Families, Part 2: Post Adoption

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Caring for a family with a new baby is a familiar process for most people. You marvel at the cheeks. Oh, those cheeks! You hand sanitize your entire body before entering a new baby’s personal space. You bring meals and diapers and cute tiny outfits to small group.

But, the adoptive family needs a different kind of care. The adoptive family might not have a happy, healthy baby. The child might be older. There are often developmental delays or special needs. The adoptive family might not even feel like a family at first.The standard oohhs and ahhs aren’t always the best way to approach the family who just adopted a child.

It is powerful when you, as a group leader, can be sensitive to the needs this family is experiencing and lead your group to love them.

Here are three ways to love the adoptive family in your group.

Ding Dong Dash

Just last month, I returned home from China, bringing with me a three-and-a-half-year-old deaf child who is now our daughter. Before leaving, a friend from church casually asked if I’d let her set up a “ding, dong, dash” meal train for us when we returned.

Because we adopted an older child with a traumatic history, we needed to keep her home and keep our home free of visitors for at least six weeks. So, my friend set up our meal train and explained our situation—we couldn’t have house guests. She requested that everyone involved ring the doorbell, leave the food on the stoop, and bolt.

Let me tell you, hot food delivered to your doorstep every night with no expectation of hospitality is one of the greatest forms of love I’ve ever been shown.

If you haven’t heard of it, bookmark mealtrain.com. It is one of the best ways to love a family that is going through a transition.

As a small group leader, you have the opportunity to take the pressure and awkwardness off of your needy family and be the one they can be specific and picky with. Then, relay their message and make sure that the other group members who sign up ding, dong, and dash with care.

Be Patient

Families with adopted children test out the waters of life in a different way than families with newborn biological babies do. With a newborn, you’re careful to avoid germs, but the adoptive family avoids trauma, drama, and environments that might trigger fear or distrust in the child.

With the adopted child, parents are looking for bonding and attachment. The parent needs to learn to love the child and the child needs to learn how to be loved. There is a lot of training that goes into adopting a child. Recommendations vary depending on which country you adopt from, how old your child is, their history, etc., but there is always the need for intentionality when putting together people who have not been a family before.

That might mean a new adoptive family doesn’t attend group for a while as they focus on building the home. It may mean they come in shifts so that child spends less time out of the home. It may mean that when they finally do come to the group together, they have a lot of weird requests about what you say and do to help the child respond to a new group of people in a healthy way.

Let the family lead when it comes to how much they want to invite interaction in the early days of their adoption. This creates an expectation for patience within the group.
Give Grace

Make an effort to extend extra grace to the adoptive family and model it for other group members. For adoptive parents, emotions can be all over the place at first. Life can be all over the place.

It was for me.

This whole beautiful experience has been a roller coaster that has left me feeling weaker and needier than ever in my life. I used to be punctual. I used to be reliable. I used to be speedy at responding to all communication. Now, I’m relearning how to do life with a new child and a whole new set of emotions and family dynamics. Your group members, in the midst of this life change, may not be themselves. They might not remember the group snack. They might not return your emails within a 24-hour window. They may cry more than you wish they would cry. Give grace. Offer help. And use the time of adoption transition to show your group the love of Jesus.

Scarlet Hiltibidal is a writer living in Nashville, TN. Scarlet has a degree in biblical counseling and worked as a Christian schoolteacher before she started writing. She has written for and managed several online publications. Currently, she does freelance writing for various Christian publishers and produces small group curriculum for children. Scarlet is wife to Brandon, who is part of the Groups Ministry Team at LifeWay, and Mommy to her daughters, Ever Grace, Brooklyn Hope, and Sawyer Joy. Visit her blog at scarlethiltibidal.com and follow her on Twitter and Instagram @ScarletEH.

Group Leadership

When Spring Fever Hits Your Group

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Spring is probably my favorite time of year. Temperatures are starting to get warmer. Grass is starting to turn green again. Trees, shrubs, and flowers are in bloom, and birds are chirping. It’s almost as if God is begging us to come outside and explore the beauty He created. Unfortunately for many, those blooming trees, shrubs, and flowers create pollen that makes time outside miserable. Nonetheless, spending time outdoors is worth the misery. Maybe that’s why it’s affectionately referred to as “spring fever.”

So what happens when spring fever hits your small group? It’s going to happen. You know it will. Families will travel for spring break. Baseball and soccer seasons start. Cheer camps. Dance recitals. Saturday hikes and picnics. Spring brings with it business. That means your small group is likely to be a bit less engaged than during the winter months. Do what you can to keep this from happening. Here are a few ways to do that.

  1. Be flexible. If the day or time you currently meet won’t work during the spring, consider moving it to accommodate your group. For example, if you normally meet during the week, try a time right before or after church on Sunday.
  2. Develop new leaders. If the group leader is going to be out for a few weeks during the spring or will miss a few sessions, train a substitute. This new leader will then cover the gaps throughout the spring (and summer) and be better prepared to start a new group of their own in the future.
  3. Find a mission. Get the group more involved in the missional aspect of discipleship. Volunteer to do a service project: serve at a homeless shelter or soup kitchen, clean up the trash on a neighborhood’s streets, plant a garden in an underprivileged community, help single moms with yard work, etc. The spring season offers many opportunities to serve.

Some people will miss a session or two because of vacations. That’s okay. In fact, it may be beneficial. When the most talkative people in your group are absent, it gives the quiet ones a better chance to speak. When the host home is not an option, it gives someone else a chance to show hospitality. These little challenges offer big opportunities for disciples to develop.

Spring is a season of growth. Do all you can to keep your group on the right track, developing and maturing as disciples of Christ.

Matt Morris is a Brand Manager at LifeWay Christian Resources in Nashville, Tennessee. He has served in ministry for over 11 years. Matt is married to Carmen and they have twins, Hudson and Harper. Matt and his family are members of First Baptist Church Mount Juliet, where he serves as a deacon. 

Group Leadership

Get to Know Our Authors: Matt Chandler

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Matt Chandler serves as the lead pastor of teaching at The Village Church in the Dallas/Fort Worth metroplex. He came to The Village in December 2002 and describes his tenure as a replanting effort to change the theological and philosophical culture of the congregation. The church has witnessed a tremendous response, growing from 160 people to more than 11,000, including campuses in Flower Mound, Dallas, Plano, and Fort Worth.

Alongside his current role as lead pastor, Matt is involved in church planting efforts both locally and internationally through The Village, as well as in various strategic partnerships. Prior to accepting the pastorate at The Village, Matt had a vibrant itinerant ministry for more than 10 years that gave him the opportunity to speak to thousands of people in America and abroad about the glory of God and the beauty of Jesus.

Matt is the author of To Live Is Christ, to Die Is Gain; The Mingling of Souls; and The Explicit Gospel Bible Study (LifeWay, 2012). He’s also a coauthor of Creature of the Word (LifeWay, 2012).

Other than knowing Jesus, Matt’s greatest joy is being married to Lauren and being the dad to their three children: Audrey, Reid, and Norah.

Find more information about Matt’s new 12-week study, The Apostles’ Creed: Together We Believe, at LifeWay.com/ApostlesCreed.